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I really need to apologize for abandoning this little blog of mine. As I’ve outlined in previous posts… shit has gotten pretty real in the past couple of weeks. It’s amazing how fast life can change and one morning I wake up feeling like a different person. I go from this routine of eat, sleep, exercise and occasionally hang out with friends to a complete hermit after being betrayed by a close friend. I thought that I would retreat to my shell for weeks but instead I got closer to some friends and started having this thing called a life. Unfortunately I haven’t found the balance between social life and healthy living. But I’m trying. And that counts for something.
If I believed in fate or any of that kind of stuff I would think that it brought me something good in exchange for the absolute crap that recently left.
Let me back up…. that friend who betrayed me. In my last post I didn’t explain exactly what went down, and I really want to get it off my chest once and for all. And then it can just be…gone. He spread rumors about me that I go to the bars every night and pick up random guys and sleep with them. He told people I used to be a nice person but I’ve turned into a huge whore. He said he doesn’t like hanging out with me because I always hit on him and it makes him really uncomfortable. Don’t get me wrong… I’m not the Virgin Mary or anything, but I don’t sleep around. I can count the number of guys I’ve done ANYTHING with on one hand. And I don’t have some freakish hand with 20 fingers or something. As for him… if he thinks that I was flirting with him, he has a bigger ego than I ever thought. We were friends for six years and I thought of him as a brother.
I haven’t spoken to him since I confronted him about the rumors, and that’s completely fine with me. He’s toxic, and I feel a lot better without him around. I also wanted to say thank you for the lovely and supportive comments, I read them over and over again when I was feeling really down and they helped so much.
Back to the good out of bad thing….
Everything just seems so much shinier right now. I have these great friends who are wonderful and supportive and a ton of fun.
Also… there might be a boy. A very cute one. I’m reluctant to talk about this for a few reasons.
1. I hate that sappy, romance novel crap. When people get all gooey it grosses me out. I don’t want to be one of those people. If I ever get like that, smack me really hard in the face, okay?
2. I’ve jumped the gun in the past and then when things implode after a week or two I feel like a complete idiot.
3. I’m fiercely independent. And horrible at relationships. I don’t like being bad at things, let alone talking about the things I’m bad at.
Oh well… everything is fair game in blog-land.
He’s nice. And nice is a big deal. The last guy I seriously dated was the biggest jerk. He’s…simple. And I don’t want that to come out wrong. He’s mellow. Low key.
Last night we drove to the next town over and walked down the beach in the rain and talked.
Oh man… I think I’m in trouble.
As for the weight loss thing (ha! I should probably mention it since that’s the point of this blog), I’m kind of just maintaining. I ran 3 miles on Monday and I’m planning to go on a run tonight. My eating hasn’t been great, but it hasn’t been horrible. I really need to get back to tracking, but I’ve been lazy. My birthday is in a couple of weeks though so I really need to get my ass in gear.
I promise I’ll check in again soon, maybe tomorrow or Friday. Sorry again for neglecting my poor blog…